Tonight you lay in bed alone,
With only the stars to count;
Dreams racing through your mind of what life would be like if only…
Mistakes from your past loom in your heart,
Casting shadows over any drop of light.
All is dark in the world,
Where has hope gone?
Where is this Savior you heard of as a child?
Where is the Redeemer now?
You feel so alone,
So lost in the abyss;
The chains of the past crushing you.
You see what you long for,
And what is no longer yours.
You feel you have ruined everything.
You are blinded by the belief that your future is void,
You have nothing without him in it.
He was, after all, everything to you;
The one you gave everything too.
And now he is gone,
And he has taken all you gave him with you.
He said he loved you,
But how can this be?
How can you hurt someone so much,
Who you claim to love?
How can you love someone,
And then leave them behind?
How can there be a tomorrow,
When it seems you have nothing left?
Why bother waking up,
When life is so empty and lonely?
The pain just intensifies,
There is nothing to numb it.
Where are your friends to pass the time?
Where are the silly jokes and days of laughter,
To keep the emptiness hidden behind smiles?
Tonight it is just you,
Only you and your pain,
And the more you sit the more anger rises up.
You cannot bear to look at yourself,
You cannot stand what the mirror holds;
Disappointment and failure etched in your scars.
And as you lay there in agony,
Pleading for an end,
Wanting nothing more than to never feel again;
I have a secret for you, Dear One.
He hears you.
The Savior you remember from your childhood tales,
Of a man who forgives and never disappoints;
Of a Redeemer filled with grace and understanding,
Who never judges,
Who only loves.
He exists, Dear One!
He is alive and well,
And He is calling you.
Can you hear Him?
Do you feel the whisper in your soul?
Beneath the screaming of your pain,
His voice is steady as a drum,
And He is calling you home.
You never really knew Him well,
You felt Him before of course.
But you never knew Him as a friend,
Never truly felt His love.
All the things that people call Him,
Are only words to you.
But it doesn’t have to stay that way,
The distance can disappear,
All you have to say is one word.
I am a sinner.
I have fallen down.
I am flawed.
I am scarred.
I am afraid.
I want more.
I want you Jesus.
He never stops calling you, Dear One.
He never stops loving you.
He never looks at you differently,
He never condemns you for your short comings.
He longs for you.
He holds his arms wide open and calls for you to embrace Him.
Because while all the people in your life,
Will someday let you down;
He never will.
While others are too busy,
He always has time for you.
While others talk over you,
He always listens.
While others get angry,
While others look down on you,
He stands up for you.
While others push you away,
He embraces you.
While others lie,
He only speaks the truth.
While others manipulate,
He enlightens you.
While others change,
He is constant.
While others fail you,
He holds you.
While others simply say they love you,
He shows you,
Just look at the scars in His hands and His feet.
I hear you crying all alone,
But Jesus counts your tears.
He is standing there,
Waiting for you to see Him,
Waiting for you to realize He was always there.
When people hurt you,
When people used you,
When they spit in your face,
And made you feel that you didn’t matter;
He was there.
When people lied to you,
And told you you were worthless;
When people made you feel like there was no point in even breathing;
He was there.
Not watching and enjoying,
But crying right there with you.
His arms were open wide,
And He was calling you,
Longing for you to turn to Him and let Him heal your pain.
Let Him love you, Dear One.
No one else can ever fulfill your needs.
No one else can ever heal your wounds,
Or make your scars melt away.
No one else can take the painful past,
And turn it into something beautiful.
He is waiting for you,
Do you feel Him calling you?
Don’t suffer for one more moment,
You don’t have to anymore.
And let Him show you the sunshine again.
Let Him hold you,
And carry you into tomorrow;
Let Jesus be your everything.
I pray for you every night, Dear One.
And just like Jesus, I will never let go.
I will never give up the hope that someday you will see what I see;
All that you could be,
If you believed.
I know this will get better,
I know you will see the light.
I believe your future is filled with purpose,
That only Jesus can reveal to you.
And all of this,
All the darkness and pain,
Will one day be but a distant memory.
All you have to say,
Blessing 13: Healing
-I could never be more grateful than I am for how Jesus took this poor, lost woman and made me whole again.